Wednesday, July 13, 2011

YOU Can't Do It!

I've always been a "can-do" kind of guy.  Pick yourself up by the bootstraps (whatever those are) and make your own way.  As Nike would have you believe...Just Do It.  I used to pity the pitiful and believe that they just needed to adopt my kind of outlook on life.  And I wasn't just a positive affirmation kind of guy.  At one point I dove head first into true Mind Sciences and tried various techniques of meditation to "unlock" my hidden inner powers.  Like the Matrix on steroids I just knew that the mind was a powerful instrument that we had hardly tapped into and a key surely existed to get to a higher level of functioning.  And I didn't just believe I could have an improved memory or the power to persuade in order to be a better salesman.  I believed we could unlock ESP gifts and move objects with our minds...if only we could discover the hidden ability.

Blame too much science fiction or an overactive imagination that was aimed at feeding a very healthy ego even more fatty treats.  I put away all pursuits to this regard upon accepting Christ as my Savior.  And within the first year of my marriage as if to permanently teach me that SELF is an unreliable source of power...I endured a severe bout of anxiety.  This experience was one of the most difficult struggles of my life and literally brought me to lay prostrate on the floor, crying, and begging God for relief. 

My old way of thinking would have encouraged that I just get more mentally tough.  To overcome the fears, and worries, and physical ailments with my mind.  Perhaps there was still part of me clinging to the old system because I clearly remember trying to do just that.  But this was MUCH more powerful than my pea brain could ever handle.  After a year of struggling and several realizations, I made it through and haven't had any issues since.  The lessons learned were invaluable though.  Humility has many layers but in each one God teaches us that YOU are not "all that and a bag of chips."

Earlier this week in my prayer time I felt compelled to share this chapter of my life with you and especially repent of my interest in the Mind Sciences.  If you can relate to ANY part of this story, I urge you to seek God's will and that you prayerfully discern the truth!