Wednesday, October 26, 2011

The Glass

The glass is half empty.

Yeah...but look at the part that is half full.

That's true but I am so tired of the half empty part and am ready to finally see more filling going on.  Look at Susie's glass!  It's 75% full.

Well Susie's glass is not only smaller but it has lots of smudges.  Would you want to trade our situation for hers?

You don't seem to understand.

Don't get me wrong, I do understand what you're are saying. I am just trying to make a counter point.

I wasn't asking for a counter point!  Besides, I am more worried about the water level than I am about what size glass we have or how clean it looks.

Well we are experiencing a drought in Texas.  And sometimes we get thirsty.  So even when we do get ahead, we use some of what we have to quench our thirst.

You're not listening to me.

Sure I am.

No.  You are too busy offering your counter points that you don't even understand my actual point.

I am just trying to offer the silver lining or even help suggest solutions.

I don't need  you to fix everything.  I just need you to listen.

Ever have this conversation with your spouse? For us the glass in question might represent relationships, finances, school options, family dynamics, work, or a whole host of life's issues.  But at some point the analysis of these things leads to a conversation where my wife and I have very different objectives in mind. 

Normally I am the fixer who constantly takes his turn offering the upside or a possible "fix".  But I do have my times where I am the one that needs to vent.  And I must admit, it can be annoying in those situations to have someone just constantly give me solutions.  Venting, by nature, is an exercise that begs for empathy.  When all is offered in return is counter-point after counter-point...well, the point is missed.  I get that yet I still always seem to realize too late that I've committed the crime.

I am 10 years into this...so maybe after 20 years of marriage I will finally figure it out!

Nah!  Probably not...

1 comments:

Rob said...

I'm 17 in and still workin on it... FYI. ;)